A trip to Potsdam

Saturday came and just went like the wind.......


Autumn is already upon us as the weather changes rapidly and without any warning. Sometimes, the sun shines the whole day but yet the temperature is chilly and cold. Other times, it is hot and sunny making you sweat like as if in Summer. But these hot moments are rare lately..... nowadays it´s difficult not to go out without a jacket. The weather changes so fast, sometimes, its better to be dressed for the chills than for the hot sun! *in my opinion that is*


On this particular weekend, hubby is working. Leaving only me and my cheeky adorable daughter alone for the weekend...... So, earlier in the week, I already made plans with Ley Poh to meet up during Saturday for lunch and some time together...... and also to pass her some smaller size clothes for her 1 year odd daughter and something to "tumpang" her when she goes back to Malaysia next weekend for 2 months... something to pass to my dad when she is back in KL.


Ohhh... did I miss out a fact... she lives in Potsdam (kinda like a neighbouring town in Berlin), which is like 1 hour 10 mins by train there! 


The menu for lunch...... strictly and typical Chinese food and.... BAK KUT TEH!!!!! *yummies* 


Been a very long time since we ate Bak Kut Teh...... and I relish and welcome that wonderful meal! *grins cheekily* Besides, Ley Poh was quite a good cook for chinese dishes ^^ 


We left home at approximately 945am, went to develop some photos to be sent back to my parents and then made our way to the train station...... only to stop at Gesundbrunnen and to take the train back home because silly mummy here forgotten to take something along....... and so.... making our way back home and all the way back to the train station.... had delayed our journey for like 1 hour odd... -.- *damn* getting old here hahahahahahahaha


And then there were some glitches here and there, due to the upcoming elections in Berlin, so many trains were.... "disrupted" their services.... took us slightly more than 1 hour 10 mins to even reach to Potsdam........ in the end, we had to take the Regional train just to get to Potsdam Haupbahnhof station...... -.-

By the time we arrived in Potsdam, it was already past noon, approximately bout 1230pm..... I had to call hubby via phone a couple of times thanks to the trains disruptions to ensure that there were no "riots" whatsoever and also to ask which is the next best solution to go there as the one that I know of were unavailable.. -.- But thank God, in the end, we arrived safely there, although late for lunch but at least before 1pm ^^ 


Potsdam town is a very nice quail and olden town where the buildings are all so in the olden times, makes you feel like as if you are walking through the 1920´s or something...... the feeling I get walking down the streets of Potsdam is like a dream come true...... where you only can see such stuff on TV (back then as a little girl growing up till now when I watch tv when in Malaysia on all the western lifestyles etc).  Amelia was so fascinated with the surroundings, the beautiful structures of the buildings and even the double decker buses here are much more ancient looking than the ones that we sat in Berlin Pankow area...


After a nice lunch and some chatting at her place, Ley Poh and her husband took both of us to the Schloss Sanssouci Park in Potsdam. Her daughter... knocked out in the stroller even before reaching our destination *haha* leaving only my daughter to run around and wander around the park.... 

Schloss Sanssouci Park is indeed breath taking! I have never seen such a beautiful vast park before! The summer palace was a grand sight indeed, although we didn´t walk into the palace... I prefer the outdoors and besides, admiring the structure and the surroundings of the palace ground was somewhat more interesting for me than being stuck inside the palace and looking at the interior of the place........


In fact... somehow, makes me wonder..... what will this entire place with its hundreds and hundreds acres of gardens and woods surrounding the palace look like in Spring time when all the flowers are in full bloom! *sighs* The wonders of nature!!!! And most importantly....... the entire palace and the surroudings, even mother nature, was and still is greatly taken care of by the people there!!! Something I rarely see when in Malaysia....... *ponders* Why we can´t do it back home also?! Oh well.. hahahahaha was just speculating.. 

There is various places to go about but we didn´t manage to walk to everywhere, just for a few spots.... Because first of it was too big the place to walk the entire place... Hahaha even Ley Poh and her husband haven´t fully covered the entire area! And secondly, Amelia herself was growing extremely tired also....... But we managed to see the Chinese Tea House that was on the palace grounds itself, although not the chance to enter and see the interiors of it. 

Somehow, am hoping maybe one day we can go back there with Sven to visit... I would love to go there one more time... although definitely not during winter.... *hahaha* I feel like hibernating for the whole time during winter... judging from the cold that we are experiencing at the moment... xD But then again, there is so much more for me to experience .... especially during winter...... heck, even my daughter needs to experience see and feel so much during her first winter this year! :) Can´t disappoint my little baby can I? ^^


But it was indeed a great experience, this Saturday, it was indeed for the both of us! We traveled across Berlin to another city (entire completely.... had to buy new tickets for bus rides and such :-s ) without Sven by our side, met up and hang out with friends and.... most importantly, enjoyed ourselves thoroughly despite the changing of the weathers from extremely cold (in the morning) to burning hot (in the afternoon) and once again back to crazily cold in the late afternoon early evening!

I am sincerely thankful for Ley Poh and her husband´s hospitality throughout the whole afternoon till evening..... and even their cute adorable daughter, that was asleep most of the time when we were in Schloss Sanssouci..... 


And am very happy and touched with her husband too for being so nice to take care of the kids and play with them while we ladies were just sitting on the bench and enjoyed talking and getting to know each other more..... Thank you for that kind gesture :) It´s indeed appreciated by me alot......


It´s rare to find such quality in men, especially from men from Malaysia.... ^^ No offense meant to anyone though... but majority always rules :P


Now.... I can´t wait for the Christmas markets to launch so that we can go visiting and taking more photos day and day of all the wonderful decorations that is gonna be coming up for the Christmas festivals......


*sighs*


We are indeed contented..... 


Ohh...... and.... Thank you hubby...... for being so nice and cooking dinner just for me and baby when we reached back home at 7pm... *hugs*

World Peace

Today, after my classes, instead of rushing to the train station like I always do, I decided to venture into the shopping mall just beside my school for some food. Well, normally I am kinda rushing straight to the train station to get on the next fastest train to go back to get my daughter from Kindergarten as I don´t want her to be the last one left there or something like it.


Anyway, I decided to do something different as I was hungry like crazy... the weather is cold like crazy and I am having fatigueness and etc non stop... so had to ease my poor stomach.....


In the centre of the mall, on my way to food, there was this pillar with 4 sides pasted all over it drawings and messages of world peace that gotten my attention. Written in various types of languages including English and German, these posters talk about world peace, and that everyone is human irregardless of skin color or race or beliefs. The posters are actually very meaningful and portray a very clear message to anyone reading it or just standing there glancing at each and every one of these posters. They clearly state world peace, 1 world, 1 people. 

You know, if the people who draw them are children..... my heart really goes out to them. Why do adults, those who lost their "innocence" in them start fighting for power and lust and etc? Why do we condemn someone else just cause they are different from us or speak different from us? Why are we so greedy that we want something that isn´t ours? Why do we demand that everything is ours?

If one is really all that God fearing and believing in God, these lands belong to God. Not mankind. You can´t take the lands and your wealth together with you when you die..... they all still exists out there and they all belong to God. So why are everyone trying to out do one another in this dying world? Why are we condemning the future generation to live in slumps and dying life forms all around us? Why are we educating our young to fight amongst overselves? 


Why do people preach so much about God and the values of God when they themselves don´t even follow and practice what they preach? Why do they keep asking God for repentance and protection when they go seeking trouble head on? Why can´t people see that the whole world is dying from their greed and their demands......

I really love those posters that I saw today in Gesundbrunnen Centre. It really touched my heart and my heart really go all way out for these people who are voicing their thoughts and opinions through these drawings. All they and many others out and around the world only want peace. We should do something about all these fighting instead of watching people fight over every single good for nothing reason. 


We all should respect each and every individual. Be it whether they believe in Allah or Jesus or Buddha etc, we should respect their beliefs and not proof each other superior. God doesn´t teach us this. Look up each and every own bible of your own. Irregardless of which religion, God doesn´t teach us to fight and proof each other superior. God teaches us to spread love and care amongst ourselves.

Learning to accept, the past & the present

The past and the present...... two things, two different times. Sometimes, the past is forgotten, other times the past lives hand in hand with the present and..... there are times the past just cannot see eye to eye with the present. Depending on individuals and the way they see into things, not every past and present and live together in harmony side by side. 


If I have a choice, I would rather have both my past and my present be able to live hand in hand together without any prejudice with each other. It makes life easier, especially for my daughter. On one hand is her biological father, whom she have no contact whatsoever for more than a year before he wanted and made an effort to see her every weekend to every once a month before we migrated and now is completely out of sight and mind for 7 months now, and on the other is her Stepfather whom has been her surrogate father for the past 7 months - playing the role of father from educating, playing, spoiling and every thing a father does together with my daughter.


I don´t want to see my daughter torn apart because of the two men in her life.


I was talking to someone online yesterday... and that person happened to be, once upon a time, a mutual friend of me and my ex husband. Thanks to his help, I realized alot of things regarding my husband - straight from my husband´s mouth (or should I say typing). For that I really thank him for it...... anyways.... I was talking to this friend of ours... and he was asking me a question, almost everyone has been asking me : "Will you let Amelia know about her father?"


First of, he is her biological father. Irregardless whether he was a good father or not, or whether he has played a fatherly role in her life before we separated - that is not the point. But the fact and the reality at the moment is, both of us (myself and my ex husband) have moved on (finally). Myself and my daughter, we migrated 10,000km away from the only home we know, aka Malaysia, to start a new life completely. New home, new friends, new surroundings, new marriage and etc. My ex husband is also already dating anew. 


At this point of time, I rather Amelia forgets her past... which isn´t hard to do. We left and moved back to my parents´ place when she was only 1 year 3 months old. My ex-husband never even came to visit or call us for more than a year. He only started seeing her again (every once a month minimum or every weekend if he can) after our divorce was finalized (which was March 2010 - Amelia was already   3 years the) and the visitations started. His visits was from every weekend to every once a month to any weekend that he was available, which isn´t all that frequent. Besides, there are many a times he let her down - as in he promised to turn up but last minute didn´t turn up. I really hated seeing the rejected look in my daughter´s eyes every time he stood her up back then. 


Hence, at the moment, I rather she forget as much as she can and move on with life. But, however, when she is older and of age, she wants to know more about her father, I would gladly tell her about the man I love and loved and probably in a strange forbidden way continue to love. Though I would not tell her the details of our separation, our affairs will be left between me and him although I won´t be able to stop him if he wants to tarnish and tell her everything. It is better for her to grow up, mature without the shadow of my ex husband overshadowing her life. Heck even he does overshadow mine with the stressing memories of our past 12 years. 


My main concern here is that my baby, my life, grows up into a gorgeous beautiful studious and intelligent lady that I know she will be without the past haunting her. I know, from past experience as a teacher in elementary school....... a child from a divorce family will grow into two types of person only : 1) If she can accept the divorce / forgot much about the past, hence she will grow up like every other normal kid. 2) If she has hatred over the divorce, then she will grow up destroying everything and everyone whom she see is having a happy life.


I don´t want my daughter going through that path. Hence I want her to forget and move on as much as possible. If given a choice, I will even ask my ex husband to stay out as much as possible to avoid her getting more confusion over her current situation.... but, I know my ex husband well enough. He is a very understanding and loving man despite his and my misunderstandings. And my trust and love for him wins that I know he will know what is best for our daughter. 


But, if I ever have a 2nd chance to talk to my ex husband, I´d say one thing. Both Amelia and myself loved him alot, more than words can ever express ourselves.


But...... We will continue moving on

10 reasons why I won´t learn driving in Germany

10 very personal good reasons why I will not learn driving in Germany (even though their license is a lifetime and no renewal) :


1) They drive on the "wrong side" of the car (:P)


2) My German is not good enough to hear the instructor gabbing in German xD


3) If you think driving in Malaysia is stressful, try Germany. While driving on the road, you have to watch out for the Trams, buses, cars, bicycles (yea many people cycle instead of driving here in Germany), Gigantic lorries, and pedestrians crossing the roads on a green light while your light is also green -.-


4) Everything is on the left side instead of the usual right (even the lanes)


5) Public transportation in Germany is so much more reliable than in Malaysia, I find no need for a car to travel around


6) Petrol is expensive.... although cars are bloody cheap.....


7) I have a monthly train/bus/tram/subway card, which I should make use of


8) I don´t know my way around Berlin enough to drive


9) The people driving here are too sane for my taste :P


10) The inner city area is too congested for driving..... and finding parking...... might as well just go everywhere and anywhere with the public transport!


And there....... that is my 10 personal reasons why I don´t intend to take / delay taking my driving license in Germany as long as possible! :P

Fewer school days next year

Fewer school days next year

And so, the schooling days for the children in Malaysia are getting shorter and shorter while the holidays are getting longer and longer. I seriously wonder how do they expect to finish teaching the children the year´s syllabus with such shorter and shorter time frame? Are holidays that important that they keep expanding the holidays and cutting short on the study days? How do you expect the children to cope with their syllabus and gain the sufficient knowledge in a specific year if they keep breaking off for holidays?

You know, back then when I was younger, there were people always saying, being a Malaysian is absolutely lucky... and somehow, as I am older, in a strange way it is... provided if you can overlook the fact that your children are not being educated to the maximum and they have more holidays than studying.....

Thank God my baby won´t be educated in Malaysia.... Wanting the best and the most for her education is way much better than having breaks every few weeks.....

No place for the beastly Malaysian

No place for the beastly Malaysian

Omg, is this how Malaysians actually care for their pets?

Animals have feelings also you know, even though they can´t speak. If you think they don´t have feelings, maybe someone should just whack the "fucks" out of your brains till you can´t talk and then torture you. Maybe then you know the feelings of these poor creatures that you all are failing miserably to take care of!

The government should take more action of pets in Malaysia, like how it is done in Germany. Taxes even for having a cat or a dog for a pet! Then maybe you´d know how to take care of your pet properly! Stupid people who don´t know how to care for other living beings than themselves. -.-

My appreciation

Today, somehow as I was sitting in the bus, something just popped into my head and made me wanna write this down. You know, everyone should really count their blessings and appreciate their surroundings or what has been given to them or more importantly, be thankful for the people around them. You would never know what tomorrow brings, not only for you but also for everyone around you.


I have been reading a few of my friends blogs and yes, it´s somehow devastating to know, especially the ones I hold dear to me, are facing difficult times or the ones they love are diagnosed with cancer etc. It just shows how life is fragile and how much we take for granted life is. Also, ironically how we only turn to God at the most painful time of our lives. Many of us, including myself, do abandon God in our daily lives and only acknowledge His presence or start cursing Him only and especially when things don´t go our way.


My daughter and myself, both of us, have come a very long way. First of, thankfully we have the guidance and the love from my parents, especially when my marriage broke apart - irregardless of who was in the right and wrong - my parents were there taking care of my daughter and myself as both of us were mumbo jumbo"ing" in an emotional state. My daughter, being only a year old, didn´t have much to encounter except the confusion as to why daddy was never there for her even before we moved back to my parents´place. But for me, my parents had to endure a full tornado and hurricane as I battled within myself to come to terms of the marriage that fell apart and also a relationship of 12 years that was just being thrown out of the window like as if nothing of it meant anything to him. 


It wasn´t an easy road for Amelia and me. But we managed to gradually grow - for my daughter gradually forget - apart from my ex husband, which I haven´t and didn´t initially intended to divorce. We, my parents and me, had many endless fights about this topic, we argued we fought we said many unforgivable things to each other, but they never let go of their eldest daughter even though to a certain point my dad completely gave up on me. I remember pushing myself and submerging myself completely into my work and also spending as much time as I can with Amelia. But thankfully for them (together with few others), we managed to overcome this big hurdle together and are now living a new life.


I was also on a spiritual struggle with God. I was, like any other human being, accusing God of all the hurt and pain I was going through back then, especially when I prayed to be given Amelia (in return I would devote her completely to God and also I would do anything in return for Him). I never once expected the "anything in return" would be this major trial and breakdown in my marriage. I never did believe that this would be something God will take in return for me having my daughter..... but then again, after months of pain and suffering, I was sort of telling myself, maybe this is a trial God is making to see if I am strong to overcome it and to trust in Him? Yea, I did my prayers and occasionally I read the bible but not that often. That´s when I slowly and gradually learn to let go, although it is tough especially if without the help of my family and few very close and good friends, and more importantly to let the anger burn away and submit to God. *ROFL* My parents and sis probably will die laughing of disbelief reading this part...... cos in the family, between them and me, I never was the "holy" one to attend church and etc... xD


Praying, or talking to myself in prayer, was much better than turning to the bible - for me that is - as I feel calmer doing it. But He made me realize and open my eyes more to my parents (the amount of pain and suffering they go through together with me, seeing me breaking down from a relationship I have been for 12 years, seeing my daughter torn apart and gradually healing her up again), and also to the few very treasured people around me who have helped me alot throughout these times even if its just sitting there and letting me cry my heart out...... 


These few very close and precious people I need to thank for..... Baby Jo, for being there every single moment when the cracks were starting to show, even when she was all the way in Aussie right up to when she was back and she had to cut short her date to come pick me and my daughter up to go back to my parents place to stop things from getting worse, Dezmond and Billy for always lending their shoulders for me to cry on and being what best friends normally are for.... silently listening to me cry and break apart, Shayne Cummings for giving me advice when I needed some and always making me laugh in the end and seeing the logic of things, Venice for the party of my life - yea baby you completely made me drunk out that night (OMG) but you came and breathe life back into my dull self *lolx*, Daniel who was there when I need someone to rely on, David Campbell for giving me a listening ear and telling myself to believe in myself and that I can do it even without him, my cousins for being there for me and even attending court with me as morale support, and most importantly Sven for giving both my daughter and myself a second chance at love, life and a family we can call our own.


We can never find words to thank Sven for all he has done. Not only he took the initiative and courage and responsibility of giving us, especially Amelia, a 2nd chance in life, he also takes it with full responsibility. He could have chosen someone who is single, never been married before and doesn´t have a kid, but he took on the challenge and took both myself and Amelia under his care. He provide financially, emotionally and physically for the both of us, fitting in the role of husband and father to Amelia. 


I love watching the way he gives her a good night kiss and hug every night, or making breakfast for the both of us or he and Amelia making breakfast surprise for me once a while, even playing together in the playground on weekends! He juggles between working (sometimes on shifts, or even outstation trips), gaming on his laptop, spending time with me and also spending time with Amelia either watching TV together all 3 of us or just taking her out to the woods and playing frisbee or having fun together with her.... he actually takes the initiative to spend time with her even when work load gets too heavy. Weekends is strictly family time, even if he is forced to work on Saturdays, he always makes sure he is back for lunch and then time off with us. For that I am thankful, that he is able to balance up his time in such a way, unlike some men.


My daughter is very proud of him. In kindergarten, her teachers tell me she always speaks highly of Sven, telling them proudly what they do together during the weekend, or what he has done or taken her to see. It makes my heart swell with joy seeing her this happy and having a fatherly figure. Although he isn´t her biological father, but seeing her having a 2nd chance at such happiness, is more than a mother can ever ask for!


Seriously.... if we were in Malaysia.... would a man do the same thing? Majority men back home have this thing against raising a kid who isn´t theirs at all, and so having a 2nd chance of love, family and home for not only myself, but also for my baby, is more than any single mum can ask for.


For these people.... who made and gave 2nd chance to my baby and my lifes, thank you so much... I really appreciate all that you have done throughout these 3 years. From my parents to all my close friends to my life partner. Thank you for all the love, courage and believe in us. *hugs*

A Double Decker Tour

The Sunday was fantastic! The weather was just nice, warm slightly chilly with the sun shining ever so bright! SO.......... after doing my usual weekly laundry, I decided to take my daughter into the heart of Berlin to take the Double Decker bus and tour around Berlin for awhile!


Believe me, the tour was well worth it, especially seeing my daughter´s face lit up with joy and unfathomable happiness when she caught sight of the tall double decker bus driving up to the bus stop on Brandenburger Tor Bus stop! Her excitement was endless as she ran up the stairs and was rushing to climb up the small winding stairs up on to the upper deck of the bus. And... unable to get a seat at the front of the upper deck, she decided to stand there and hang on to the railings just to catch sight of the city from the upper view, never even wanting to take a seat at all even though there were other seats available slightly back. 


We toured all over, and nearly ended up not even leaving the bus if she hadn´t caught sight of the tall tower with the Angel statue in the middle of the roundabout while half way on tour! Hence, we took the next nearest stop, toured the tiny roundabout, walked around the embassies before taking the next Double Decker back to the train station.... a long bus ride we had today that´s for sure..... and Amelia just enjoyed herself thoroughly completely! 


Planning to go back again the coming weekend, this time visiting more places and also taking the double decker bus.. And I absolutely adore the way my daughter says double decker bus... she goes and say "decker decker bus" :) Wow.... Haha thankfully, the decker decker bus is only available in the heart of Berlin, or more precisely, where the tourists attractions are! :) Else I would be taking decker decker bus to her school every morning and afternoon! xD 

We had alot of fun you know, just sitting on the bus and going all around the city... and as she doesn´t have to pay for a ticket and my ticket is a monthly ticket, we could just sit in the bus from one end of the stop to the other end of the stop without getting chased down! xD Photography was abit kinda hard though from the bus as the bus is always on the move, not all photos taken were...... beautiful :( We even passed by the Volkswagon Club house and a few other brand and grand car shops that..... *drools* have the most amazing and gorgeous looking cars ever! xD


The most amazing part.... was the endless woods you can find, even in the city area, where when peering inside or going into the woods, you find many families, couples and etc having picnics or just lying on the vast area of grass sun tanning and enjoying reading a book or snoozing away! It´s just so amazing to have such areas like these in the heart of the city, and more importantly, the air isn´t all that polluted even if it was at the heart of it all! The embassies of various countries all over the world was situated all around these areas..... the area is highly secured with many police cars and such patrolling the area. 


Although some of the embassies are looking grand and mighty, there are some that just looks like a normal office building, except for the country flag (representing the country it is representing) standing proudly in front of the building. Amongst all of these embassies, is the Malaysian Embassy. With the Jalur Gemilang standing proudly outside the embassy, the Malaysian Embassy itself is looking ordinary on the outside, but inside (well I have been there for the Buka Raya makan makan) is quite nice to look at.... feels especially at home there seeing all the flags and the rukun negara logo and such. But anyhow, today, we didn´t stop by there. Instead, we found many other interesting sights to see.... than the usual Malaysian sights... :P 


The one fascinating one was this one here, from the Chinese Kulturen. My daughter was so fascinated with it, for myself... I was feeling more at home seeing finally some chinese words... Hahahahaha but then again, it´s just the embassy area. *sighs* Somehow I really do miss home in a way you know...... although to many they think I don´t . But then again, the path is where we are now, there is no turning back. Not when every thing has been left behind. :)


Anyways... overall, this is a fruitful day for both myself and my baby.......


You know, I seriously can´t wait for our Scotland trip in November! xD


ps : For full album photos of our decker trip, please visit A Double Decker Tour album

All The Wrong Places - Tyler Ward and Justin Reid (Feat....

Tell me why do you fall?
So far that you cant contain it?
Tell me why cant you see that your searching all the wrong places
Baby, You dont know
But i will try to explain it
Baby, why cant you see that your searching
All the wrong places

I dont wanna play these games anymore
Tired of watching you walk out the door
Hiding here still, scared to reveal
How we really feel
Baby this is so real

Tell me have you ever noticed when we’re all alone
How you get so nervous
Baby why cant you see that your searching
All the wrong places
You say you’ve been through it all
And you don’t know how your gonna change it
Baby why cant you see that your searching
All the wrong places

I dont wanna play these games anymore
Tired of watching you walk out the door
Hiding here still,Too scared to reveal how we really feel
Baby this is so real

Just looking right at the stars
Just look where we are
Just look where we are

September Starts.... Autumn fast Approaching

So...... now it´s already the month of September. It´s finally entering Autumn soon, as Autumn is fast approaching with the changes of the weather and temperature. Also, the days are growing shorter, night falls coming earlier than before. Previously, in Summer, the moon doesn´t even come or.... the sky isn´t dark at all until about 11pm. Now, the sky darkens and all earliest by 830pm. It´s getting earlier and earlier as day goes by..... Temperature is dropping and dropping even though the sun is shining ever so brightly in the sky!

It´s already 7 months now, baby and myself have been here in this foreign land and making it our new home. In this 7 months, we have learnt many things together and from each other while growing up together. My daughter is growing beautifully and remarkably wonderful, although with it comes the complication of growing up.... the temperaments of a child and etc. I love her even more than I have ever had and for me, she is still and will always be the main important part of my life!


Kindergarten is going on great and fine with her. Now, we speak mix of German and English at home as well as when we are out and about. Our German, both my daughter and myself, ain´t that good yet to even start with a full fledge German conversation but we are learning alot from each other, especially me from her as she is learning more of the basic compared to my learning in my German course.

We have moved on alot. Forgetting many things from the past, other than my parents and Uncle Dez, we rarely speak and keep in contact with people from the past and from Malaysia. For myself, occasionally those whom contact me via facebook or via my daughter´s account of facebook. But for my daughter, the only people she keeps in touch are with my family and Dezzie from time to time. Somehow it is best this way. After months of struggles, she too have finally managed to put alot of the past things and life behind and forgotten. Somehow, in a way, it is good - from my own personal point of view. Now, with our new lives, we have people in Malaysia who loves us still - aka my family, Dezzie, Baby Jo, Venice, Onny and the few others (Thank you), and we have new found family and friends here in Germany that loves us and is always around us when we need help with.


Most importantly, she has a male figure in her life guiding her now constantly - although I fear that task isn´t simple and easy for him. I never did say being a parent is easy, not with the new "dos and dont´s" and the conversion from being a bachelor to a tied figure and a father figurine. But it is good that she finally has someone that is there full time and willing to take the time to learn together with her, for that I am thankful. And for my daughter, she is extremely happy.... it is even sometimes nice to see how she is proudly showing him off to all her classmates or how she brags about him to her teachers and friends in kindergarten - from her teacher´s feedbacks.  :)

Life is about learning from each other as we grow up, grow older and older. In life we never stop learning. It´s amazing how much I am learning as a mother of 4 years nearly 5 now... and yet I am still learning. xD No wonder my father always tell me to never stop learning...... ^^

So now, as we prepare to brace ourselves to encounter our first Autumn together, from preparing clothes to buying winter shoes and clothes for the upcoming winter..... we will look forward to move on hand in had as we continue on with our journey steps.........