A True Friend

Tuesday February 17, 2015

A few months after his son´s tragic death, my friend told me that people who had been close were now avoiding him and his family. He said it was as if people no longer wanted to be around them. I asked him why he thought the poor comforters were acting this way. His answer troubled me, for I knew it was the hard truth : "When people don´t feel they can fix a situation, they try to pretend it´s not there. They feel embarrassed."

We tend to condemn Job´s friends for their incorrect representation of God and Job´s situation. Indeed, it´s true that they got things woefully wrong. But at least they came! (Job 2:11). Not only did they show up, they wept with their friend (v.12) - just as we´re instructed to do in Romans 12:15. Later, knowing that they couldn´t fix the situation, they simply sat with Job instead of talking or walking away. What a comfort it is when a true friend simply sits with another in their pain, offers no counsel, but stays nonetheless.

Sadly, Job´s friends didn´t keep their mouths shut. They offered their human "wisdom" and soon proved by their comments how little they understood. But, before that, they had been true friends of the highest order!

Before we condemn the poor comforters of Job, let´s reflect on this : God sent the men to Job and they were initially a comfort to him. And later, His rebuke of them was far from terminal! In fact, god allowed Job to minister to his friends even though they had unsuccessfully ministered to him (Job 42:7-9). He knew that they had wanted to help, but went about it in the wrong way.

Let´s choose to draw close to those who are grieving and hurting. Our help may not be perfect, but true friends will reach out. - Russell Fralick

Read
Job 2:11-13
When Job´s three friends, Eliphaz the Temanite, Bildad the Shuhite and Zophar the Naamathite, heard about all the troubles that had come upon hi, they set out from their homes and met together by agreement to go and sympathize with him and comfort him. When they saw him from a distance, they could hardly recognize him; they began to weep aloud, and they tore their robes and sprinkled dust on their heads. Then they sat on the ground with him for seven days and seven nights. No one said a word to him, because they saw how great his suffering was.

John 15:12-17
My command is this : Love each other as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends. You are my friends if you do what I command. I no longer call you servants, because a servant does not know his master´s business. Instead I have called you friends, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you. You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you to go and bear fruit - fruit that will last. Then the Father will give you whatever you ask in my name. This is my command : Love each other.

Question to Ponder
Are you available to comfort those who mourn, to weep with those who weep, even when you feel inadequate?
How can you be a true friend this week to a person who needs one?

**Article taken from ODJ (Our Daily Journey with God) Dec 2014 - Feb 2015 issue