Ouchl....... damn.....
Ok... mental note to myself... no matter how hard is it in future... if I ever get pregnant again, I´d definitely breast feed my child... xD

Mothers out there... read up!!!

Breast milk plays key role in brain development

21 March 2010 By Associate Prof Dr POH BEE KOON

MILK is the main source of nutrition for all babies, and the milk produced by mothers has is tailored specially to the newborn’s needs.

Breast milk contains just the right balance of nutrients, such as fats, proteins, lactose, vitamins, minerals, and water, for newborns. These provide the optimal nutritional, immunological, and emotional nurturing for an infant to grow and develop. Thus, it comes as no surprise that the World Health Organisation and UNICEF identify it as the “gold-standard” in infant nutrition.

Most importantly, breast milk also plays a key role in children’s brain development. It is rich in omega-3 and omega-6 fatty acids (DHA and AA), taurine, choline, zinc, and many other nutrients that support this process. While it cannot be guaranteed that breast milk will turn your newborn into the next Einstein, it can be guaranteed that it will help your infant’s brain achieve its maximum potential. But how sure are we that breast milk is the way to go?

The relationship between breastfeeding and children’s intelligence has definitely generated much research interest. The literature is extensive, and numerous studies have indeed proven the link between breastfeeding and positive neuro-developmental gains. The following studies and conclusions are a few of many that clearly support this association.

1. Breastmilk and subsequent intelligence quotient in children born preterm by Lucas, A et al, Lancet (1992).

Higher IQ: This study was the first to discover that in children who were born pre-term, those who had consumed breast milk in their early weeks of life had, on average, an 8.3-point advantage in IQ compared to other children. The advantages in IQ were maintained even after the researchers compared children with the same maternal education levels and social class.

2. Duration of breastfeeding and developmental milestones during the latter half of infancy by Vestergaard, M et al, Acta Pediatrica (1999).

Mastery of developmental milestones: Three developmental milestones related to general and fine motor skills and early language development were assessed in 1,656 healthy infants at six months of age. Results showed that the longer a child was breastfed, the quicker she mastered specific developmental milestones.

3. Breastfeeding and child cognitive development by Kramer, MS et al, Archives of General Psychiatry (2008).

Improved cognitive and academic performance: This randomised trial is the largest to date, with more than 15,000 healthy breastfeeding infants involved. Results showed prolonged and exclusive breastfeeding produced children with better cognitive development and academic achievement.

Brain food from the breast

A baby’s brain develops rapidly in the first few years of life, and it is important to support this process with a good balance of “brain-building” nutrients. As breast milk conveniently contains these, it is very important to provide your baby with breast milk right from the start and to continue at least until she is two years of age.

So, what are the “brain-building” nutrients in breast milk that make it so important?

· Fatty acids – The cells in the brain are largely made from a group of long-chained polyunsaturated fatty acids called DHA (docosahexaenoic acid) and AA (arachidonic acid). These fatty acids support the information processing and transmission that occurs in the brain.

However, DHA and AA are not readily found in the human body, and neither are the fatty acids required to synthesise them, namely, alpha-linolenic acid (ALA) and linoleic acid (LA).

These fatty acids can only be obtained from a person’s diet, and breast milk contains one of the highest levels of these fatty acids (derived from a single source).

· Phospholipids – Effective transmission of information among neurons in the brain is dependent on the myelination of neurons, ie the coating of each with a layer of fat (myelin) that speeds up transmission. Cholesterol, which is found in high concentrations in breast milk, is also necessary for this process.

· Taurine – Taurine plays an important role in the development of the brain and eyes. Specifically, taurine plays a role in the synthesis of brain neurotransmitters that are important for nerve communication. However, the body is unable to synthesise this amino acid, so its presence in breast milk is very significant.

· Choline – The roles that choline plays in the development and functioning of the brain are many. It is needed for the synthesis of phospholipids, transmission of information between brain cells, and also improves memory. In fact, when cells are deprived of this nutrient, they are programmed to die in a process called apoptosis.

· Zinc – Zinc supports cell division and growth. Additionally, zinc has been credited as the nutrient that protects cells in the brain and central nervous system due to its antioxidant properties.

Breast milk also has various kinds of disease-fighting substances, including antibodies, which help protect your child’s body against harmful infections.

Breast milk also has antioxidants that protect babies against allergies. The healthier your child is, the more she will be able to develop into the intelligent young adult that she can be.

The body of research has conclusively shown that breastfeeding does indeed play a crucial role in the development of babies’ brains, not only due to its nutritional content, but also through the bonding that occurs during breastfeeding.

However, breastfeeding alone cannot sustain your child’s development past six months due to their rapid growth. Continue feeding your baby’s brain by providing her with a well-balanced diet beyond her breastfeeding days.

Remember, no single nutrient can support your child’s growth and brain development. A combination of a wide range of nutrients must work in concert to help your child fulfil her optimal potential.
This article is courtesy of the Positive Parenting Nutrition Programme by the Malaysian Paediatric Association in collaboration with the Nutrition Society of Malaysia, and supported by an educational grant from Abbott Nutrition International. For more information, please visit www.mypositiveparenting.org.

Shorten Hair!

Had a total long weekend this week.... with my dad´s 60th and my daughter´s 3rd birthday going on....... yesterday was on leave due to my daughter´s actual birthday was yesterday...... 


We did a hangout, me and my daughter... at home... didn´t go anywhere... as I didn´t know where to go and where to take her to....... so we spent quality time together, playing at home... and she even followed me to the barber to get my hair cut! Yeapppssss... you heard me right.... I had my hair cut, after like.. a year plus of not cutting my hair via the saloon, I got it cut yesterday *cries*


My hair... is currently at shoulder length..... no more that long silky long hair of mine........ sighsssss


End of March is fast approaching..... 
With it, comes the usual of finance closing and calculating of the commission and expenses reports once again...... sighs.... Somehow, I am wondering if I would be facing more problem again next month as today I just attended a meeting that is actually requiring us to change the formats of our commission reports once again...... I wonder why do people don´t just stick to one format once and for all instead of changing it every month like some person changing their underwear... xD


With April comes the 2nd month of the separation part....... Life seems to be getting along fine nowadays, we actually are blending in to not having my ex husband in my life, although he went and upset the whole balance of things last week by wanting to see our daughter..... she came back distraughted and disturbed..... and cried her heart out... which all I can do is look at her sadly....


Wonder why sometimes, adults always thinks they know better and that children can cope with the changes? 


Why do adults still insist of harming their children ´unintentionally` just because they think that what they are doing is right and it won´t affect their children?


Sighs..........


And I thought he has more brains than I do... unfortunately, some things just don´t change.... well.. I can´t say much if he really enjoys tormenting her mentally and emotionally this way....

A very interesting article, although... its like 2 years too late now.. ROFL....

Well, I agree with the writer of this article that both parents are to be blamed... but then again, he never was here physically emotionally and mentally for both me and our daughter....so... lolx.... all he ever knew back then was work and gaming, though I don´t know how much that changes now and besides, it doesn´t make a difference anymore...

But nevertheless, parents out there... before you come to a mistake like me.... read on...

Is your spouse a bad parent?

22 March 2010

By BRIGITTE ROZARIO

The definition of a bad parent is very subjective. It could be someone who neglects, abandons or abuses his children. Or it could even be a parent who provides financially but isn't there emotionally or psychologically for the children.

If you are reading this article, chances are you think your spouse isn't committed enough to the children or isn't spending enough time with your kids.

Family life educator Charis Patrick says it does happen and it's not always the dad, too. Even mums are sometimes guilty of this.

She explains that sometimes it is because the parent feels they are not ready for a baby and would rather run away from the responsibility.

“If your marriage is at a stage where you can communicate then I would suggest you talk it out with your spouse.

“Tell him or her that this is your child and you can't cope by yourself and you both need to take care of the child together.

“If he or she still cannot be bothered then I think you have to carry out your parenting role the best that you can while continuously trying to bring your spouse in,” says Patrick.

Assign tasks

She advises the responsible parent to study the strengths of their spouse. If the hands-off parent is not good at changing diapers or managing the child's meals, then perhaps give him or her some other task such as taking care of the money.

This means that when the child starts going to school, the job of liaising with the school will fall on one parent and the job of giving out the pocket money will be the other parent's job.

“Don't suddenly give your spouse 10 tasks to do. He or she will be so overwhelmed. Perhaps you could start with three things to begin with that you know he or she will be quite willing to take up. Or ask him/her: 'I know you feel overwhelmed with childcare, what are the three things you would like to start with?'

“When your spouse feels it is possible maybe he or she will feel motivated to come in and join you in this parenting journey,” she adds.

If your children are already schoolgoing they will tell you if they think dad or mum isn't spending enough time with them.

However, for smaller children you would be planning their routine and it would be up to you to monitor if your spouse isn't spending enough time with them.

“A very common scenario is when you want to take the family out but your husband does nothing about it and seems disinterested. I would tell the woman to plan and propose the outing and get him to approve it. Just tell him the time and date, tell him when to take leave and then make it happen. And, really hope that he enjoys that time so that he will be motivated to do it again the next time,” says Patrick.

Alternatively, you could tell him to plan the next outing. That's another way to get him involved.

Don't overdo it

If your spouse is assigned to plan an outing and he fails to plan anything, don't drive yourself crazy trying to organise that outing for him.

Let the whole family go through the consequence of him failing to plan the outing.

“As much as you guide and support, sometimes you just have to let the family enjoy the natural consequences so that he will sense the disappointment of the children and he will be motivated the next time to do better and not disappoint the whole family,” says Patrick.

She warns parents, especially women, not to overdo it when it comes to planning routines and outings for the family. There is the risk that you are so good at planning that your spouse acknowledges it and insists you keep doing it.

She explains that typically women tend to do too much in some families. What happens then is that the wife/mother is so efficient that she does all the tasks herself, not leaving space for her husband to play his role as the father.
 

Patrick: 'If you step back will your spouse step in to do more?'

“You have to see the dynamics. If you step back will your spouse step in to do more? And if your spouse is really quite bad at parenting, then you may have to maintain a lot of the responsibility for a while for the sake of the children. Meanwhile continue that negotiation with your spouse. You won't know how he will respond until you try so maybe you should learn how to take a step back. It's quite difficult for some women who have an overperforming role.”

Golf and holiday dads

How about the once-a-year-holiday dads or the golf dads?

Patrick reminds parents that relationships are not built on once-a-year vacations. Building a relationship is a daily affair. The same goes for golf dads who work hard and then play golf on the weekends, leaving the wife to handle the family.
 

“Honestly speaking it doesn't take a lot for a golf-playing dad to just make sure when he comes back from work every day that he connects with his child. If they are small, read to them a bedtime story. If they are teenagers, talk to them about their world views, their thinking or about their day. And that will be the great connect when you go for your annual vacation.

“It doesn't work if you have not been connecting day to day and suddenly you go for a vacation together. You won't know how to be together for 24 hours a day in a resort. It is meaningless if you go for a family holiday when you're all off doing your own thing (instead of spending time together).

“If you ask me if taking a family vacation will make up for the lost time on a regular basis, I will say no,” says Patrick.

If, despite all your efforts, your spouse still insists he or she has no time for the children because he or she has to work, then there needs to be a conversation between the husband and wife.

Perhaps a compromise can be met whereby your spouse agrees to come home early once a week. It needs to be early enough to see the children before they go to bed.

“Those who have a choice need to make their children a priority. Some families really have no choice because they need to work hard and work overtime because they need the money to keep the family going.

“The wonderful thing is that if the child knows you are working super hard to pay the bills and therefore you have no time for them usually they will understand. If you have a choice to come back but prefer to be out or spend time with other people, they will know that you don't care about them,” she explains.

What if your spouse really does want to do more but he or she is really bad at certain tasks that even your child prefers you to do it? For example, your child might prefer you to do crafts with her because dad just messes it up.

“For me, as long as he's prepared to step in it's a very good sign. It may not be up to your standard and perhaps you will just have to suffer that lower standard for a while. Whether the child is happy or not is less important than dad's involvement because his involvement is a long-term plan. He needs time to grow into that role. Unless you give him the time and space to grow, mature and be good at that, he will never learn and the last thing you want to do is push him out of that role.

“I think men need a lot of encouragement for the small achievements. Don't put them down.”

The ex-spouse

What happens if the hands-off and non-committal parent is your ex-husband or ex-wife? It could be that they're not spending enough time with the children or they want to take the children out for a treat at 10pm on a school night.

Says Patrick:

“If the 'bad' parent is an ex-spouse, I will explain to the child that because daddy and mummy live in different households, we have different families and different rules now. You could perhaps say, 'I know that when you go there you are allowed to play games the whole day and indulge. Because that is not my family anymore, I can't say anything but I want to let you know that when you come back to my family, my rules apply.'

“The child needs to know that. If the child is mature enough, I will try to explain the consequences to all the things that they are allowed to indulge in at the other parent's house.

“I would be very honest and tell the child that I have no control on what happens on the other side but perhaps they might want to think it through on their own and make their own decisions. This way, if your ex-spouse wants to take them out late on a school night, they can then choose whether to go or not. At least you plant that thought in the child to let him or her know that they have a choice.

“I would never attempt to change the other parent who is an ex-spouse, but I would let the child know that when they are with me my rules still apply and they have a choice when they are in the other parent's house. And I would remind myself not to say bad things about the other person.

“If your ex-spouse wants to take the children out on a school night when the child is with you, then I would put my foot down. The child needs some routine. Explain to your ex that the children would love to go out with her/him but not tonight because it's a school night.

“It may not be easy but if I have custody then I would do what's in the best interest of the child. I would then say 'No' and the other parent has no right to come and take my child because it's outside of their visitation time/rights with the child. Still, be very cordial about it. It's important not to get emotional because that's when it's very bad for the child because the child will feel very torn.”

She says that parents should never try to explain or make excuses for the other party because you can never be accurate. Even if you manage to, you'll probably be half lying and the child will know it.

If you are divorced, it is best not to try and control what happens when your children are with their other parent.

Your children will eventually realise that you have very little say in what happens on the other side and when you're transparent and honest they will really appreciate you.

Happy Birthday my princess (3 yrs old) & Dad (60 yrs old)

Happy happy birthday to my little princess!!! and belated birthday to my dad (Yesterday - 21/3/2010)....... a double celebration we had yesterday at my parents´ place... 

The weekend finally crossed, with the hecticness all gone..... yesterday was the most hectic..... with the celebration of my dad´s 60th birthday together with my daughter´s 3rd birthday at our place....... Firstly, the party was good, although the weather wasn´t that accomodating..... it was raining slightly...... but, dad was remarkably surprised.... he didn´t expect many of the guests, especially our relatives.... Guess it was good. :)

Sister did a good job of cooking, she always has... as she always had a knack for cooking unlike me...... ROFL... I only know the basics of cooking, enough to survive and feed the family... though she is the creative one in the kitchen.......

 Somehow, time passes really fast, seeing my daughter growing older and my father aging.... just feels like yesterday, I was a small little girl running around with daddy to play with and accompany. But now, I am a mother myself taking care of my own daughter. Ironic isn´t it.... how life can get... ROFL...... 

Really hate birthdays... especially my daughter´s birthday.... brings back fond memories of her first birthday we had in my parents´ place..... back then... when there was a family still.... the photos of him together with us as a family and all. Sighs...... Wonder will the pain ever stop for the both of us? Will he allow us to forget him peacefully and let us heal with time?


I guess.... only he will know....

Many women think that after having kids, your life is totally doomed, no freedom no happiness and bla bla bla.....this is because they are unable to go shopping, do whatever they want or even spend their on quiet time..... somehow... I feel it´s such bullshit.....


Why?


Well.... basically because..... ever since having my little baby, not much changes there are in my life... well, except that everything I do has to have her in mind.. but.... I never had problem shopping or going out even with my daughter........ she´s totally perfect when going out... in fact, now we have another outting... that appeals to my daughter... going out to parks like the Zoo, or the Bird Park or butterfly farm....... as she loves animals more and her mummy doesnt really like shopping that much ^^


But anyways... I found this interesting article a parent wrote in to the parenting page for advice on bringing out a hyper baby for shopping..... I hope it comes in handy...... for the mummies out there..

How to go shopping with toddler in tow

10 March 2010

CHILDWISE
By RUTH LIEW
I HAVE a very active two-and-a-half year old son. It is very challenging to go shopping with him. He is quite a handful in the stores, and is very loud and demanding.

We used to take him out in a stroller. These days, he would resist getting into the stroller. He wants to walk around like us. I don’t want him to run around and start breaking things in the shops.

Any tips on how to shop with a toddler without him breaking into tantrums or drawing angry stares from shopkeepers? – Mother Of A Toddler

Having a say: Children enjoy being able to choose a toy for themselves.

Shopping with a toddler can be quite a harrowing experience. Many parents of toddlers often choose to go out with their children when the shops are not too crowded.

Before you set out to the shopping malls, make sure your toddler is not hungry, tired or overwhelmed by too many activities happening in a day.

Don’t pack in a long, shopping trip when your child is still very young. Keep it short and simple.

Your child has limits to his attention span and energy level. He needs breaks for a snack, a drink or a short nap. Plan to do all your shopping within a short span of time and then take a break for fun and games with your toddler before heading for home.

Your toddler is naturally curious. He is fascinated and attracted by the displays on the shelves in the shops. If you tell him, “Don’t touch this or that,” he will keep on doing it out of curiosity. He does not intend to make you angry.

When something catches his attention, he may want to hold it or play with it. Tell him he can just look at it. You can say to him: “Let’s just look at it together.” Whenever possible, demonstrate to him how he can handle an object with care.

There is no place for an active toddler during the sales. I have seen many parents let go of their toddlers’ hands when they rummage through the sales items. Children get hurt when they are in crowded shops. With poor ventilation and surrounded by strange faces, many toddlers can feel very insecure and frightened.

If you are looking for a bargain, bring a relative or a friend along. Better still, arrange a play date for your toddler at a friend’s house. You can always return the favour at a later date.

Your child will not be able to take long hours of shopping during a sales. Your son can be quite demanding when you are lining up at the checkout. If you have brought along a nutritious snack and a drink from home, you can say to him: “The chocolate bar is not a nutritious snack. We have brought one tasty snack that you enjoy. You can have it once we are done paying for our groceries.”

Keep a leisurely pace when shopping with your toddler.

You may want to seek his opinion when making a purchase. You can ask: “Do you like the pink or the orange one?” When you ask your son for his opinion, he feels that he is a participant and not a bystander.

All children like the idea of being able to choose some items on their own. You can set up a small budget for your child to choose something for himself to make it more enjoyable for him.

If the item is too expensive or you feel it is not suitable for him, say “No” to him. At the same time, you may want to offer an alternative that works for him. Children do not like rejections.

They can accept it when you give them a reasonable explanation and a substitute.

You may feel tired during a shopping trip with your toddler. When you are exhausted, you may be less patient and understanding.

If you catch yourself feeling agitated by your toddler’s antics, let him know: “Mummy is feeling tired. We both need some fresh air and quiet time.”

Find a quiet spot in the mall. There’s always one where there are less people crowding around. Have a drink and read a storybook together. Once both of you feel better, then you can move on.

Hör bitte auf

Hör bitte auf..Es schmerzt viel, obwohl ich schweigen.... Ich möchte diesen Schmerz Zu stoppen. Ich kann nicht den Schmerz mehr.

The reminders, the memories, the places everywhere in the whole of Malaysia and Singapore haunted with memories, and you, of all people, doing what you are doing now...

How do i heal when all these crashes onto me day in and day out?

How can I not remember when the memories floats everywhere I go in KL itself?

How can I stop the pain when you aren't helping but doing something behind me?

You say it's for my own good... Telling the truth to mein männchen before we marry... Is it really?

Nein!!!! Hör bitte auf..... I beg everyone, especially you.

I surrender... EVERYTHING is my fault... Just let me go...

Mein männchen, bitte nehmen sie mich von hier weg.... Ich bitte sie.......

~*~ Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone ~*~

Location:Jalan Loke Yew,Kuala Lumpur,Malaysia

Thanks To You

 Thanks To You

Thank you for teaching me how to love
Showing me what the world means
What I've been dreamin' of
And now I know, there is nothing that I could not do
Thanks to You

For teaching me how to feel
Showing me my emotions
Letting me know what's real
From what is not
What I've got is more that I'd ever hoped for
And a lot of what I hope for is
Thanks to you

No mountain, no valley
No time, no space
No heartache, no heartbreak
No fall from grace
Can't stop me from believing
That my love will pull me through
Thanks to You
There's no mountain, no valley
No time, no space
No heartache, no heartbreak
No fall from grace
Can't stop me from believing
That my love will see me through
Thanks to You
Thanks to You

For teaching me how to live
Putting things in perspective
Teaching me how to give
And how to take
No mistake
We were put here together
And if I breakdown
Forgive me but it's true
That I'm aching with the love I feel inside
Thanks to You
Thanks to you

Intimacy during pregnancy

If you are a first time getting pregnant... ever wondered if there would be a chance or is it risky to have intimacy during your pregnancy? Or........ can we, both partners, can withstand not having sex for 9 months? :)

With my only experience.... sex during pregnancy is kinda..... can be described as fantastic!! Rofl... guess its due to the reason that hormones and all senses are sharper than usual... but nevertheless, my 9 months of pregnancy was still like normal although like doctors recommend, not every... "style" is applicable! ROFL....

Anyways.. I found an interesting article on The Star Online website regarding this topic... and just... merely wanted to share this remarkable article with everyone that drops by....

Wednesday March 17, 2010

Intimacy during pregnancy
THE DOCTOR SAYS By DR MILTON LUM


Numerous concerns often lead to a downturn in sexual activity when a woman is pregnant.


IT IS common for women who are pregnant for the first time, to wonder whether sexual intercourse will affect the developing foetus.

The common questions include whether sexual intercourse will harm the foetus or cause infection and whether it can lead to miscarriage or premature labour.

Another common question in the last trimester of pregnancy is what position to use and if any position is safer than others.

There are many bodily changes in pregnancy that affects a woman’s sex life.

Some women feel sexier. Others are not in the mood, especially when they have nausea and vomiting in the first trimester.

Some women report an increase in libido in the second trimester. When the third trimester comes along, many women report a decrease in libido.


The variation in feelings and experiences are normal. It is important to remember that there is no norm. The feelings and experiences may also vary in the same woman in different pregnancies.

There is an increase in the blood flow to the reproductive organs during pregnancy, causing them to engorge. This increases sensation in some women but is uncomfortable in other women, to the extent that sexual intercourse may be painful.


An orgasm can cause an increase in uterine activity with contractions felt especially in the third trimester. The contractions last a few minutes and then go away, just like the Braxton Hicks contractions.

There may also be changes in the spouse or partner. His interest may wane in the third trimester because of a variety of reasons. It may be because of concern about the health of the pregnant woman and/or fear of harming the pregnant woman and/or the foetus. There may also be anxiety about impending parenthood.


Normal pregnancy
The developing foetus lies in a fluid-filled sac within the uterus. The sac and the uterine muscles protect the foetus from harm. There is a plug of mucus in the cervix that prevents infection from ascending from the vagina into the uterus.

Orgasm may cause some uterine activity which, however, does not harm the foetus. This increased uterine activity is not the same as the contractions that one gets in early labour. So it is safe for women with a normal pregnancy to have sexual intercourse during pregnancy even right up to the time when labour starts.

There is no relationship between sexual intercourse and miscarriage and premature labour in women with a normal pregnancy. In fact, there are reports that women who had regular sex during pregnancy were less likely to go into premature labour.


Sex during pregnancy may also enhance the relationship with the spouse or partner during the pregnancy and after childbirth.


It is important to confirm with the doctor on a regular basis that there are no pregnancy problems and that the pregnancy is normal.

There are certain conditions which, if present, would result in the doctor advising to refrain from sexual intercourse.


The doctor should be consulted without delay if there is bleeding and/or pain during pregnancy, whether associated with sexual intercourse or not.

An obstetric examination and an ultrasound will usually be done to elucidate the cause of the bleeding and/or pain and reassure that the foetus is all right.


The placenta may sometimes lie on the cervix (placenta praevia). In such a situation, the doctor will advise refraining from vaginal intercourse altogether.



If there is recurrent bleeding and there is no placenta praevia, the doctor may advise a reduction in the frequency of sex. This does not mean that one cannot partake of other forms of sexual activity.



The risk of infection to the foetus is not increased if the man does not have a sexually transmitted infection. If he does, it should be treated and once cured, sexual intercourse can be resumed. However, if the man has herpes, it would be advisable to refrain from sexual intercourse. If a pregnant woman gets genital herpes for the first time, there is a small likelihood that the foetus would be infected.



The doctor would also advise the pregnant woman to refrain from sexual intercourse if there is leakage of the fluid in the sac (liquor) surrounding the foetus because of the risk of infection of the liquor and through it, the foetus, as well. If there is a history of weakness of the cervix, it would also be advisable to refrain from sexual intercourse.


As the abdomen increases in size with advancing pregnancy, the woman may be uncomfortable with the traditional man on top position. It is advisable to find alternative positions. By trying out various other positions, the couple will find one that they are both comfortable with.

It is safe to have sexual intercourse in a normal pregnancy. It is important to check with the doctor on a regular basis that there are no pregnancy problems.



The doctor may advise refraining from sexual intercourse when certain conditions are present. One would need to adapt as pregnancy advances.

■ Dr Milton Lum is a member of the board of Medical Defence Malaysia. This article is not intended to replace, dictate or define evaluation by a qualified doctor. The views expressed do not represent that of any organisation the writer is associated with.

Does your little baby snore? If so... read on! :)

Does your child snore?

14 March 2010 By Dr RAYMOND TAN SUAN-KUO
SLEEP apnea, generally considered a problem among middle-aged men, can be a problem for youngsters, too. The third Malaysian National Health and Morbidity Survey 2006 tells us that 20% of Malaysian children are obese. With the increasing rates of obesity in children, it’s likely there will also be an increase in sleep apnea. It is estimated that 5 to 10% of Malaysian children suffer from sleep apnea.

Sleep apnea is characterised by brief but numerous involuntary breathing pauses during sleep. These breathing pauses cause awakenings throughout the night, making it impossible for sleep apnea sufferers to enjoy a night of deep, restorative sleep.

People with sleep apnea often feel sleepy during the day and their concentration and daytime performance suffer. While being overweight or obese are risk factors for sleep apnea, being thin does not preclude a diagnosis.

The repercussions of sleep apnea and poor sleep for children are vast. When children do not get the sleep they need, they are at risk for health, performance, and safety problems; difficulties in school are often the result. However, sleep deprivation in children is often overlooked or attributed to attention-deficit or behaviour disorders.

Parents should be aware of night time and daytime symptoms of sleep apnea.

Night time symptoms include snoring, breathing pauses during sleep, restless sleep, mouth breathing, difficulty getting up in the morning, even after getting the proper amount of sleep.

Daytime symptoms include hyperactivity, inattention, behaviour problems, e.g. aggressive behaviour, problems at school, sleepiness and headaches

To help your child get a good night’s sleep, follow these tips:

·Establish a regular bedtime and wake up time. Parents and children should plan a daily schedule that includes the basic daily sleep requirements for particular age groups. This schedule should be maintained on the weekends, though students can be permitted to sleep in one or two hours on weekend mornings if necessary.

While individual sleep needs can vary, the amount of sleep suggested by sleep experts for particular age groups is:

18 months to three 3 years: 12-14 hours

Three to five years: 11-13 hours

Five to 12 years: 10-11 hours

Teens: 9.25 hours

·Create a bedtime routine. Bedtime routines are important, regardless of a child’s age. It should include at least 15 to 30 minutes of calm, soothing activities. Discourage television, exercise, computer and telephone use, and avoid caffeine (found in beverages, chocolate and other products).

·Achieve a balanced schedule. Identify and prioritise activities that allow for downtime and sufficient sleep time. Help students avoid an overloaded schedule that can lead to stress and difficulty coping, which contribute to poor health and sleep problems.

To help children maintain a healthy body weight, follow these tips:

·Be supportive. Children know if they are overweight and don’t need to be reminded or singled out.

·Plan family activities that involve exercise. Instead of watching TV, go hiking or biking, wash the car, or walk around the mall. Offer choices and let your children decide.

·Eat meals together as a family and eat at the table, not in front of the television. Eat slowly and enjoy the food.

·Don’t use food as a reward or punishment. Children should not be placed on restrictive diets unless done so by a doctor (for medical reasons). Children need food for growth, development and energy.

How to diagnose:

·Seek treatment from an ENT specialist

·Look for large tonsils and adenoids

·Child may have an “adenoids face” – a long face with flat cheeks, open-mouthed look with thick lower-lips, caused by years of mouthy breathing and little air entering the maxillary (cheeks) sinuses.

·Look for high blood pressure

·Look for poor growth (failure to thrive) and also, paradoxically, obesity.

·Look for heart problems, e.g. heart failure and lung problems

·May need a sleep study

How to treat:

1. Main treatment in children – Surgery: remove the enlarged tonsils and adenoids

2. Lose weight – Help children maintain a healthy body weight.

3. Nasal steroid sprays for nasal allergies

4. CPAP (Continuous Positive Airway Pressure) mask at night for children who still have OSA and are very symptomatic after surgery.

Which other groups of children are at high risk of developing OSA?

·Down’s Syndrome

·Children with craniofacial abnormalities e.g. Pierre Robin sequence, Treacher Collins Syndrome, Crouzon Syndrome.

■ Dr Raymond Tan Suan-Kuo is a consultant ENT surgeon and snoring specialist. For further information, e-mail starhealth@thestar.com.my. The information provided is for educational and communication purposes only and it should not be construed as personal medical advice. Information published in this article is not intended to replace, supplant or augment a consultation with a health professional regarding the reader’s own medical care. The Star does not give any warranty on accuracy, completeness, functionality, usefulness or other assurances as to the content appearing in this column. The Star disclaims all responsibility for any losses, damage to property or personal injury suffered directly or indirectly from reliance on such information.

Hypocrissy

Pissed..... That the one whom you thought you can trust most is like a snake in the grass....

Payback?

Hhmmmmmmm maybe....

But I think it immature to hurt an innocent one along....


~*~ Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone ~*~

Location:Jalan Loke Yew,Kuala Lumpur,Malaysia

Weekend escapade

Another weekend came and went once again... Bring us to mid of March... Another 6 more days to the log awaited birthday of my dad's 60th birthday and my little princess' 3rd birthday! Well this weekend will definitely be extremely busy with the preparation of the party together with my sister's help....



Had a tiring weekend for the weekend that just passed... Took my daughter to the bird park on Saturday and to the zoo on Sunday together with my parents.. she totally enjoyed herself thoroughly for this two days... Seeing her joy in her face... So unbuyable!

The bird park apparently changed quite a bit with all the completed renovation works... There were many waterfalls and many a places for great photography...took many marvellous photos of my beautiful daughter and a few of us together... Hard to find people to hold the camera.... There weren't many visitors to the bird park, surprisingly... Though somehow I wish they'd add more species of birds to the park.... Nevertheless, my daughter enjoyed the whole park chasing the birds all over with joy! Lolx... The wonders of being a little child once again!!!!



Apparently, the birdpark isn't the only place that has changes... In 6 months of not visiting the zoo, there were slight changes to the Zoo... Like there is now an insect and butterfly kingdom situated within the zoo itself.... The entry price of the zoo has increased to a total of RM 20 instead of the usual RM 15 that I've paid to visit all these while... And to make it more frustrating, senior citizens for the zoo only starts at 60! WTF?!

We didn't manage to walk the whole zoo completely as we only went there after church service and my daughter insisting that my parents tag along..... So only went and reached there bout 145pm... We spent our time there till like bout 5pm, due to the sudden weather change, we had to stop half way and abort our trip in case of heavy downpour... Hhhmmmmm......



But it was funfilled for amelia.... And she reached home sleeping! Lolx....

I guess I should start taking her out every weekend once again.... Hhmmmmmmm

~*~ Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone ~*~

Location:Jalan Loke Yew,Kuala Lumpur,Malaysia

Nice holiday start

I kinda forgot... School holiday starts today.... Nevertheless.... Started my weekend by taking my gorgeous angel to the bird park on KL.... The weather is perfect... Neither too hot or too cold but just cloudy....

There weren't many people around here... Reached the park at approximately 1130am and actually still here, which is like already nearly 230pm now.... Majority of the parks visitors are foreigners.... amelia is totally thrilled to be here actually as the last time we went for nature parks was nearly 6 months ago...

Being stuck in between operations, in and out of hospital and juggling with come back of work, there just didn't seem to have time for park visits, though honestly all parks here, amelia has visited it like more than 4 times! Lolx

The bird park changed quite abit as the places that it was initially renovating is now completed and there were just new places to visit altogether....

My little princess just had fun... Chasing the small birds, taking photos everywhere and playing with little chicks at the nursery! And most interestingly... Grown bigger, more curious more questions asked! Lolx!!! Some of the questions... Too hard to even answer!!!

After walking like hours, we are actually now sitting here having a picnic of our own... And enjoying the birds walking and flying by.... Amelia... Totally engrossed in her sandwiches gave me time to browse around and sit here to blog while she munches away on her food and look at the peahens and their kids running around. :)

Tonight's definitely going to be a long night as I have loads of photos of us to upload! Wwwweeeeee ^^

Where else will we head to after this journey in the bird park..... Can't help but wonder.... Hhhhmmmmmmm


~*~ Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone ~*~

Location:Jalan Ria,Kuala Lumpur,Malaysia

Look at me

Look at me
Look into my eyes
It should come as no surprise
Things look different here


Look at me
See my hands and feet
Just a little less complete
But the picture is clear


When you look at me
What do you see
A slightly damaged package
Or a gift from God


When you look at me
Look into my heart
That's where you can start to understand
That this face you see when you look at me
Was created by God's hands


Look at me
See me when I smile
I'm heavens precious child sent from up above
Look at me
Hear me when I sing
I'm thankful for the things God has done


When you look at me
What do you see
A slightly damaged package
Or a gift from God


When you look at me
Look into my heart
That's where you can start to understand
That this face you see
When you look at me
Was created by God's hands


When you look at me
Look into my heart
We're not so far apart it's plain to see
When I look at you
I see someone who
Looks alot like me


And when I look at you
I see someone who
Looks alot like me




~*~ Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone ~*~

Location:Jalan Loke Yew,Kuala Lumpur,Malaysia

Getting ur first baby only to find out you are losing sleep over your baby´s sleep? Lolx.. welcome to my world.... when I initially given birth to my baby.... feeding every 2 hourly... it sure was a total nightmare to be unable to sleep..... given that my ex husband needs to sleep and he gets totally grouchy when lack of sleep, the tension rises tremendously...... wonder how come I didnt resort to articles like these when I was pregnant... xD

Anyways, this article is kinda useful.... for those new parents out there... before you guys start losing your hair over your sleepless baby... ^^

Losing Zzz's over baby's sleep

8 March 2010

A newborn will sleep about 16-20 hours. This is the period where he only wakes up for feeds and then goes straight back to sleep.

By BRIGITTE ROZARIO

Some babies sleep easily; others seem to need more coaxing. No two babies are the same and no solution works for all babies.

Sometimes, when all else fails, you just have to pick them up and rock them to sleep.

Paediatrician Dr Yong Junina says you can never spoil babies by carrying them and especially so when they can't go to sleep on their own.

“In the beginning they will need to be carried because they want to feel the heartbeat of the mother. You can let them sleep on your chest and then put them in their cots once they've settled down. As they get more independent and start crawling and walking, you will be carrying them less anyway because they'll be playing during the day but there's no such thing as spoiling them by carrying them too much,” she says.

Where to sleep

Ideally newborns should sleep in their own cot on their backs with the cot sides up. Dr Yong explains that newborns should sleep on their back because studies have shown that babies who sleep on their tummies have a higher incidence of cot death or sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS).

It is also better for them to sleep in their cot on their own to avoid getting suffocated by the parents and the pillows.

If you're breastfeeding and don't want to walk to another room to feed baby at night, Dr Yong suggests getting a bedside cot that can be attached to the mother's bed. Put the cot side down so that it matches the height of the mother's bed. Then the mother can just reach out to feed the baby.

The cot

If there is a blanket in the cot then it should be tucked in and no higher than the baby's chest. Again, this is to avoid suffocation. Traditionally, some people like to swaddle the baby but medically there are no benefits; there is no harm in it, either.

Dr Yong says there shouldn't be pillows for newborns because pillows too can contribute to suffocation.

The baby's mattress should be firm. Dr Yong suggests getting the polyester foam kind, not soft kapok. If you use a soft mattress, and if the child should sleep on his tummy, the mattress will mould to the face of the child and that increases the risk of suffocation.

Using bumper sheets (which go around the sides of the cot) is fine because these are tied to the sides of the cot. But they should only remain there as long as the child can't pull himself up and stand on that to try and climb out.

Once the baby can turn over he can sleep on either side. By that point it's fine for him to sleep on either his back or his tummy.

When the child is young you can put a soft toy that is fit for his age in the cot – that means no removable eyes and nothing that he can bite off. Or you could have a cot mobile to keep the baby entertained. If the child is older and can crawl, then he can use any toys in the cot to step on and climb out of the cot.

So, when he is older put the cot base all the way down. It is okay to put some soft toys inside the cot but nothing he can use to climb out. And nothing with small parts that can come off and risk him choking on.

When it's time to sleep remove the toys because they will deter the child from sleeping. After the child has gone to sleep, then you could put them back at the end of the cot.

Among the early concerns of parents is the shape of their newborn's head. Often the head is flatter on one side because baby has been sleeping on his back.

Dr Yong advises parents not to worry about the shape of baby's head.

“That is just temporary because babies tend to roll over by the time they reach four to six months. By the time they start rolling over they will move their head around and that will even out the head shape. In fact, they only lie in one position for about two months and after that you'll find that their head turns from the right to the left,” she says.

Self-comfort?

While it is okay to allow older children (12-15 months) to cry and comfort themselves to sleep, you need to firstly ensure they are not crying because they are wet or hungry.

Sometimes the child just wants the mother to be in the room with him.

Dr Yong suggests slowly coaxing the child when he is a bit older into a routine where you give him a shower, have dinner, no TV for half an hour to one hour before bedtime so that he can unwind, and if he is old enough, read him a bedtime story.

“You can sit in bed with him, read him to sleep, tuck him in and pat him to sleep so that he becomes familiar with the routine. Try to stick to that routine every day.
 

Dr Yong: 'The first few times you put him to sleep, you have to fool him into thinking you're also going to bed.'

“A lot of times the child has a problem going to sleep because he sleeps in the same room as the parents and the parents are watching TV or the child knows the parents are going to watch TV after he falls asleep. The first few times you put him to sleep, you have to fool him into thinking you're also going to bed. So, you lie down with him. More often than not, you will fall asleep, too,” she points out.

If the parents go for a holiday and leave the child in the care of the extended family, the child will have trouble sleeping and being comforted because of the sudden change in routine and environment.

“Imagine yourself in that poor child's shoes. Suddenly the parents are missing. No parents, no familiar smell, and if he's now in someone else's house, there's a change in environment as well. The people taking care of him will just have to console him. If the child's environment remains the same, then it might be easier to comfort him.

“If you know you're going to be travelling a lot, if you have an extended family then you get the child accustomed to going over to that house. Try getting the baby familiar with going to that house, then perhaps sleeping over just one night (while you're still in town),” suggests Dr Yong.

How much sleep?

A newborn will sleep about 16-20 hours. This is the period where he only wakes up for feeds and then goes straight back to sleep.

Asked if there was a possibility of trying to adjust baby's feeding times so that he sleeps through the night, Dr Yong said, “No, babies should be fed on demand especially when they are young because they don't have enough nutrients to last them through the night.

“If you don't feed them at night, then their blood sugar level will start to drop so you need to feed them on demand.

“If they're not on solids yet and you're breastfeeding, then you feed them until about midnight, let them have a big feed, then they may last for about four hours.

“Breast milk is digested at a faster rate so the chances of them getting hungry soon are greater. That's why breastfed babies feed every two hours while bottlefed babies feed every three to four hours.

“Because you can't see how much breast milk your child is taking, you need to estimate. If the child is taking five minutes per breast then maybe you coax him to go back to the first breast and see if he will take some more.

“If the child doesn't want to feed more and keeps waking up every two hours, then there's nothing much you can do. In which case check first if the child is wet or cold. He may not necessarily be hungry and sometimes he may wake up because he wants to play.

“If he sleeps at 8pm or 9pm, then wake him up and feed him at midnight so that the next feeding time will be pushed to about 4am. Then, slowly, as he gets older drinks more, he is able to hold more milk, then he will sleep for a longer period.

“After six months, you would start feeding him solids so you can actually time the solids so that he is fuller for a longer period. Instead of waking up every two hours maybe then he will wake up at 1am and then again at 6am.

“You can give him his dinner at 7pm, then milk at 9pm or 10pm, and he'll still be quite full. Then he'll probably sleep for six hours.

“Once the child is older, he will start eating more and his sleep pattern also starts to change. Then he will be able to sleep for the whole eight to 10 hours at night,” she says.

Dr Yong adds that if baby just wakes up for the comfort then giving him water will discourage him from waking up. But you can only do that if baby is well nourished, growing well and is about six months old already. Then you know he has enough reserves. For a newborn, you still can't do that.

“After six months if he's just waking up and grinning at you, you know he's not really hungry. He just wants to play with you. Then you can try giving him plain water to drink.”

The schooling child

As the child gets older and starts going to school, he would only need about eight to 10 hours of sleep a day.

Napping during the day is fine as long as it doesn't interfere with the night sleep. According to Dr Yong, some children can't sleep at night if they take a two-hour nap in the afternoon.

If sleeping at night is not a problem, then preschoolers can take a couple of hours to nap in the afternoon after they come home from the kindergarten. Then they can go to sleep at night at about 9pm.

If the child is sleepy in the afternoon then nothing you do will prevent him from taking a nap, anyway. In that case, make sure the child slowly unwinds at night – give him an early dinner, switch off the TV early and have a nice quiet environment to help the child sleep.

Sleep for growth

Sleep is very important for both parents and adults. If a child doesn't get sufficient sleep, he becomes grumpy in the morning, he can't concentrate and it affects his growth as well because the growth hormone is secreted at night. If the child doesn't get 10 hours of sleep, the next morning you'll find that he doesn't pay attention in class and he doesn't grow as well. All this will translate into poor exam results.

It will also affect his health and immune system and he will be more susceptible to infections because his body is not well rested.

“If the child still has problems sleeping at night then you get him to be really active in the afternoon. When he comes back from school, take him to the park and let him run, exhaust him, then give him his dinner and a warm cup of milk or chocolate malt drink, then put him to bed.

“Very often, you find that children can't sleep because they are having dinner at 9pm. Dinner should be at about 7.30pm or 8pm and the TV should be switched off by 8.30pm so that they can go to bed by 9pm or 9.30pm.

“Make it a rule that he goes into the bedroom by 9pm, then you can read him a bedtime story and he will eventually fall asleep by 9.30pm.

“So even if he falls asleep by 10, by the time he wakes up at 6am the next morning, he would have had eight hours of sleep.

“But if you keep him out till late then he won't fall asleep by 9.30 or 10pm,” warns Dr Yong.

Omigosh... there are new censorship coming into town..... already our own censorship is bad enough..... what more now that there is new changes to this censorship thing....

Published: Monday March 8, 2010 MYT 3:50:00 PM

New film censorship rules on March 15

By DHARMENDER SINGH

PUTRAJAYA: The changes being made to the Film Censorship Guidelines -- the first in 14 years -- would come into effect on March 15, said Home Ministry secretary-general Datuk Seri Mahmood Adam.

He claimed the changes had been thoroughly discussed and agreed to by all concerned parties including directors, producers, script-writers and distributors.

He said some of the items added to the guidelines had actually come from those in the industry while others took into account “current trends and lifestyles that might conflict with the norms in Malaysia.”

“There are some changes that some of the representatives have asked for in the draft guidelines but these are mainly on the terms used and the spelling, so it will not be difficult to iron all of them out by the end of the week,” he said after chairing the Film Censorship Guidelines meeting here Monday.

He said he was also happy that the changes, which will also see the Film Censorship Board being less rigid in certain areas, had been well received by representatives from the industry.

Local producer and director Datuk Yusof Haslam said he was happy that the new guidelines were not as rigid as before because this would allow more films to get the approval for general viewing (U) rather than having them restricted to the 13-year-old and 18-year-old and above age groups (PG-13, 18SG, 18SX, 18PA, 18PL and 18PL).

“When films are categorised for viewing only by those aged above 13 or 18, we end up having a smaller audience and this means less revenue.

“I am also happy that there is a chance now for us to submit our scripts to the Film Censorship Board for screening so that any parts that are considered offensive would be pointed out for changes to made before shooting begins,” he said.

Another local producer and director David Teo said the guidelines were good because they clearly laid out the dos and don’ts, and this allowed producers and directors prepare their scripts accordingly.

“It is a good system that allows us to remove any parts (deemed offensive), rather than having them removed during the censorship stage,” he said.

Abducted Daughter

Reading more and more distressing news on the local newspaper regarding child abduction... this piece of news that I saw on yesterday´s headlines on the local newspaper and also online newspaper was distressing....

A child was abducted and most amusingly, by her father who has divorced the mother. Custody was given to the mother.... hence and god knows why, the father decides to abduct the child... what do our government do? Nothing! What´s the excuse? It´s a maritial affairs and they can´t do anything about it as it´s something commonly happening.... WOW?!

Sometimes, these things are the things that amazes us citizens and decide that ..... migrating to another country with the whole family is better than staying here. you don´t even care.... about your citizens and such... you allow divorce cases to be kidnapped and such...... in a divorce case, especially once it´s all finalized and such, we have a COURT ORDER regarding the terms of our divorce..... do the authorities turn a blind eye to this too? Then... what is the fucking use of going all the way to court, getting the court order and such... when a court order is irrelevant in such cases?! Why is the government is emphasing on procedures and such... when to only be in the end not being bothered about it?! And then not upkeeping such procedures?!

Then due to the inavailability to our authorities and all, this poor mother is resorting to the help of the media, that our ´CARING´ citizens will help keep an eye out if they ever see her baby......

To my readers out there, do read the following article, and ........ if you really do stumble upon her little girl, do help out..... the authorities...... well I guess... don´t have feelings? Or just don´t give a damn? Who knows.... but for us all out here..... just imagine... what would it feel like.. if it happened to your own child.... do help keep a lookout!

Friday March 5, 2010

Mum seeks info on abducted daughter

PETALING JAYA: The last 48 days have been harrowing for the mother of 19-month-old Daanya Hana Leanora who claims she has been abducted by her enstranged husband.

Researcher Farah Shamsuddin, 31, claimed that her daughter was taken by her husband Lenardi Amnisar Yuliawiratman, 32, on Jan 16 at a fast-food outlet in Ampang.

Distraught mum: Farah showing Daanya’s photo at Mont Kiara yesterday. Looking on are her parents.

In a CCTV footage, Lernardi was seen running out from the restaurant into a waiting car before a group of people pulled Farah away from the vehicle.

Farah and her family were told by the police that Lenardi had left for Batam, Indonesia, with the baby through Port Stulang in Johor on Jan 18, two days after a police report was lodged.

“Speaking to the press is my last resort to appeal to the public to locate my daughter.

“I was shunned by the authorities each time I sought help as they dismissed my case as family and marital problems,” she told reporters yesterday at a law firm where she had gone to seek help.

“All I want is my daughter’s safe return and for me to be able to breastfeed her once again.”

Farah claimed she had exhausted all means of getting her daughter back including seeking help from the authorities.

She was accompanied by her father Shamsuddin Mahyuddin, 70, mother Zubaidah Mohd Sidek, 59 and sister Shahrizat, 29.

Shahrizat said her sister had custody of Daanya pending the completion of her divorce.

Meanwhile, non-governmental orgnisations have described the case as “parental kidnapping.”

Voice of the Children chairperson Sharmila Sekaran said Farah’s case was the sixth in the last two months.

Women’s Aid Organisation executive director Ivy Josiah said such cases were becoming common as there was a lack of proper protocol in procedures when a child goes missing.

Those with information on the missing child, can contact Tini at 012-2951 818 or Shahrizat at 012-6890 542.

The pain of missing you

4 days... Since you left my side, walking into the international terminal lounge.... 4 days since I silently weep for your presence, your love and your touch. The house feels so empty without your presence. My room feels cold and void without your cheerie smiles when I walk through the door. The nights seems so endless, sleepless and tired without you lying by my side.

How I wish I could turn back the hands of time to the time when I walked out my office lift to see you standing tall with the biggest brightest smile when your eyes saw me walk out the lift... Or how you lifted me into a big embrace ever so tightly. I know goodbye isn't forever... Especially for us.... But yet.... To not have you by my side.... That's the excrutiatingly painful moments for me...

Ich liebe dich mein engel...

I promise... I'll be strong... It's only a while more....
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Malaysian teachers say ‘no’ to sex education

Ok... I found this totally amusing and interesting article...... that was on The Star online.... Its title caught my eye....... regarding the sex education in our country.....

I wonder when are people gonna realize the importance of this sex education amongst the younger generation? Why... are we.... living in the stone ages? Where everything seems to be a big big taboo?

Published: Tuesday March 2, 2010 MYT 3:26:00 PM
Updated: Tuesday March 2, 2010 MYT 3:49:36 PM

Malaysian teachers say ‘no’ to sex education (Updated)

KUALA LUMPUR: Malaysian teachers are saying “no” to teaching sex education in schools.

They lack professional training in teaching the subject, National Union of Teaching Profession (NUTP) secretary-general Lok Yim Pheng said Tuesday.

She said while the union fully supported the Government’s move to provide sex education in schools, “sadly, the teachers lack formal training in the complexity and sensitivity of the subject and are not confident to teach it.”

Lok said the teachers were afraid they might be sued by the parents “if they were to make mistakes in imparting the knowledge of sex to the pupils.”

Malaysia is a multiracial, religious and cultural nation with each ethnic group having its own notion on the subject, which made the teaching more challenging, she noted.

The NUTP is the country’s biggest teachers union representing 160,000 teachers, which is approximately half the teaching profession.

Lok said the union wanted the Education Ministry to first hold discussions with stakeholders on the pros and cons of the move before making a firm decision.

Currently, the subject was taught in “bits and pieces” from the primary level to secondary level, in the absence of a proper structured course.

Of late, sex education has become a very important issue in the country, with an increasing number of unwed mothers, many of them students.

Meanwhile, a Bernama survey among students, parents and teachers showed that all groups were in favour of sex education but were unsure of the form and content of the course.

Teenage student Jayaraman said he was all for it, but was unsure what and how the teachers were going to teach because “we have more girls than boys in our class and most of our teachers are female.”

Abdul Raof Bidin, 38, who has two school-going children, felt that it was necessary to teach the subject.

“It should be handled with care as it could easily be misconstrued and do more harm than good, if wrongly imparted,” he said.

Another parent, M. Arumugam, 44, believes it was better for medical professionals like doctors and nurses to impart the subject to students.

”Maybe the Education Ministry should consult the Health Ministry and come up with some kind of arrangement for teachers to be provided with on-the-job training,” he said.

Betty Lee, who has been a teacher for 24 years, felt that the subject was best handled by “teachers who themselves are mothers and know how to handle such a complex subject.”

”With due respect, not all teachers can teach the subject, and the ministry should be very careful in selecting the right candidate for the job,” said the 50-year-old. -- Bernama