The End of December 2010

Glancing at the calendar at my work desk this morning, I realize that we are just 2 days away from entering a new year!!!! Amazing how fast time flies..... seems just like yesterday it was at the beginning of the year, and now..... we are venturing into a brand new year.

In this year, alot has happened. Next year, a brand new year and life is starting for both me and Amelia. Alot of new challenges and new life for us to encounter.  

Briefly looking back in the year, my daughter and I had many wonderful remarkable journeys the whole year through. We have learnt alot from each other, we have grown older, grown "wiser", grown more beautiful together and met new people and travelled everywhere together.


I dont regret walking this path alone with my daughter, nor do I regret the decision that me and my daughter have done throughout the past year and previous years :)


But moving ahead, to year 2011, with God´s blessings and guidance, we will start another new life of ours. As I prepare my daughter for school aka kindergarden, and myself, a whole new world of work and experience.


Happy New Year everyone..... I do hope your new year´s resolutions will come true!


Hugs n Kisses
Pat & Amelia

The Tour Continues

With the weekend just ended, the 3rd week seems to be blooming over.

As time passes by, my daughter and I starts getting more and more busy with the hectic schedule of Christmas Photography every night plus the additional outings with my parents such as pre Christmas parties and such. Nevertheless, we still manage to continue with our photography journey, although there are a few repetitions and such. Happens when your travels takes you back to the place that you go to...... ^^


Anyways.....

For up to date, the 9th day of our Xmas stop, we took a stop to Mid Valley City and also to the Gardens. Two shopping Centres situated side by side each other. The theme that was being used in The  Gardens was Follow Us on a Merry Measure. Mid Valley.... Kinda forgotten to take note of the theme that they are using for Xmas this year... Got too excited after seeing the vast Teddy display at the centre court, North court and also South Court that night! Even my daughter was captivated with the gigantic sized teddies all over the mall in Mid Valley City!

Gradually.... our 10th Day of Xmas stop approched.... It was yet another movie night out.... this time to watch Narnia at TGV Sunway Pyramid. This time around, we managed to walk the mall, we went there earlier to get good shots, and managed to see the finished lights at the miniature roundabout in front of Sunway Lagoon. The mall was slightly packed for a Friday night..... *GOSH* ..... but nevertheless, we managed to find a good spot of parking, got our tickets like 1 hour earlier before time... and manage to grab ice cream before going for our movie! Amelia brought her 2 unicorns down to watch the movie together, and we managed..... to even have absolute laughter and fun and gleeful joy together........ 


Day 11th of December 2010

This time around, I did something different. Instead of taking her out at night like I normally did, I took her out in the afternoon. Well.. I hate to admit... taking her out in the afternoon has its pros and cons....... first of, it´s still bloody congested as ever..... secondly, the afternoon weather is hot.... extremely hot..... and thirdly, the outdoor decorations? Well.... let´s just say they do look kinda plain in the bright sunlight! Anyways... I probably have to bring her back to Ikano Power Centre, Curve and e@curve another night... but for the 11th day of our Xmas expedition..... I took her to these 3 places back to back as they were automatically connected to each other in just walking distance..... The decorations are superb.... beautiful to be exact... although I can´t say much about the outdoor ones as like I said earlier.... any decorations outdoor are always shunned by the power of sunlight in your eyes. You´d barely get to see the remarkable colors of the decorations then...... 


Tiring..... Absolutely tiring.....


But hey... we are getting closer to Christmas....... Can´t just give up now can I? Not when my daughter loves the decorations and the radiant joy on her face is so unmistakeable!!!


Well.... We will continue our journey.... :)

Day 8th (2nd week) of Christmas Tour

Our day 8 of our Xmas Photography tour is jeopardized!

Well... Actually it was suppose to be a movie night out (once again) for both me and my daughter... and also to take the opportunity to take a few photos of 1 Utama Old wing.... but then again...... surprise surprise..... with the heavy downpour of rain and the heavy traffic.... we just reached there just in time for our movie... -.- 


Well some of you would probably ask... why are we watching Rapunzel for the 2nd time? Well.... my daughter wants to watch it... so I decided to take her watch for the 2nd time...... Though 1 Utama was definitely not my first choice of a venue...... 


She got excited seeing this Kungfu Panda 2 poster... wanted to pose with it.... so ...... there it is... my proud baby, with the hooded jacket looking absolutely cute and adorable!


Too bad.... our 8th day is jeopardized!!!!! *sighs* But... was fruitful in a way.... she got to see some lights, from above the highest floor of the Old Wing... looking down the centre court, she saw the remarkable beautiful decos of the Old Wing (Although not as fascinating as the New Wing).

On the other hand...... I manage to drop by KLCC during lunch when was at work. The decorations for Centre stage has changed. Though nothing as dramatic and gorgeous as last year´s decorations. Their theme this year was purple and white, sort of like their theme color anyways. 


The mall as usual was freaking crowded...... and barely had much time myself to scout the area for bits and tads of decorations. Probably have to take baby down to KLCC once again though I kind of don´t relish the idea of doing so....... But..... it´s part of our 25 days tour around town... so yea......


I guess day 10 of our xmas tour would also be jeopardized as we will be going to Sunway Pyramid to watch the movie Narnia.... hmmmmmmmm probably have to do 2 replacement tour days later on ^^

The Christmas Photography Month

It´s the 6th day of December...... with the start of December, I made a decision to go all around Selangor and anywhere accessible in our reach for this whole month.... As it is, she loves lights so much, I just decided to share with her the different types of themes and decorations all around KL and Selangor has to offer to my beautiful daughter.

Mind you... these trips are and can be extremely exhausting as majority of it... well.... cos I am definitely not on a whole month vacation. 

For the first day of December, my daughter and I took a trip into a Fantasy Christmas at Sunway Pyramid. Decorated magnificiently, Sunway has always been the "largest" in decoration wise as they not only have the interior of the shopping mall to decorate but also the whole street going to Sunway Pyramid, Sunway Lagoon and also Sunway Resort Hotel. The decorations at the mini roundabout at the entrance of Sunway Pyramid was beautifully decorated while the skies above, from lampost to lampost, was connected beautifully with lights that shapes of bells and parachuts that has little stars, angels and gingerbread men hanging from the parachuts. Other than that, just outside of Sunway Resort Hotel, the waterfront, there is a magnificient decorations of xmas decorations beautifully lit up at nights. 

For our 2nd trip out on our xmas photography shoot nights, we decided to go to yet another nearby location, Subang Parade. Though it wasn´t fully decorated finish, the centre stage within the mall wasn´t completed yet, we managed to get some really nice shots of the place. Theme as Meredith´s Merry Christmas, I am kinda curious what centre stage would look like as there were many flowers decorations nearby and around it. Guess I need to take Amelia back there once again to find out.


Moving on... 3rd of December 2010......


Our next stop was back to I-City in Shah Alam. Without any theme, this large vast park is wholly a display of lights and decorations both outdoor and indoor. This time around, Amelia and myself took the time to walk around FULLY the whole park even to the snow house that is situated there...... Though I hate to admit.. I was hoping the snow house would be greater and nicer with snow and such.. but oh well... it´s merely air conditioned and loads of sculptures and artificial snow aka cotton all over the floor... but nevertheless, my daughter was extremely thrilled and happy to be there.... Her fascination of lights, astounds me!


4th day... and still not tired out at all! 

As it is the weekend...... we decided to bring grandma and grandpa along on our excursion to capture the xmas moments all over town.  This time around..... I decided to bring my parents and daughter to 1 Utama as their xmas theme was very homely.... Come Home... The theme was..... and with its beautifully crafted and designed houses, it really reminded me alot of the cottages and houses  I saw when I was in Germany last year! 1 Utama is kinda a hassle to go to....... we took alot of time just finding the parking itself.... Congested as always, I am happy that we finally covered 1 Utama, although it was only at the new wing...... hhhmmmmm *thinks* should I go there again but this time to the old wing? Don´t even know if there will be any decorations in the old wing...........




Anyways.........


Continuing on our xmas journey.....

5th of December. Another weekend...... this time around.... the weekend brings me and my daughter together with my parents once again to Empire shopping centre..... Empire.... a brand new shopping mall situated in Subang Jaya..... really amazed me with its decorations...... It created a mini winter wonderland with it´s xmas theme " A Ratty Magical Christmas" and a wonderful mini train around and surrounding with the backdrop of snow and wonderful white xmas trees all around! For me personally, well done for a first xmas! :D


Coming to a week of doing this........

My daughter and I enter our 6th day of photography..... today.... was a disappointment as we took ourselves to Summit Shopping Centre in USJ. The decoration.... is BAD..... not much deco, not much emphasizing....... the theme? Crayon ShinChan (What christmas theme is that?!) But... Amelia enjoyed herself, although not much... as there were many Doraemons there (her latest favourite of that fat blue doll). Surprisingly, I somehow don´t like Doraemon... maybe it´s cos of that high pitch voice of his or whatsoever.... but I feel the cartoon is kinda dumb and definitely not suitable for Amelia to watch... xD Anyways.... We didn´t spend long at Summit as there wasn´t much to see and take photos of.


The last day of the first week of touring.....
7th December 2010 (Tuesday).

My daughter and I, together with my mum decided to go slightly further this time and to a somewhat new shopping mall call Tropicana Mall. This mall is considered kinda new, probably a year or 2 old only. The theme was cute.... A very Jolly Lolly Christmas it was. Surrounded by cookies and gingerbread men and snowman, Tropicana Mall is indeed a colorful sight, capturing customer´s attention to the vast display of Christmas goodies, toys and gifts at the centre stage with the various items on sale! The one thing that captured my eye the most was the santarina dress I saw there for children! Am so tempted to just get one for my beautiful baby...... *in deep thought* 


Well other than just the decorations, we were actually there to watch my sister perform like usual for her annual AFC (All For Christ) group that performs every Christmas. However, sadly to say, this year´s performance was abit...... disappointing. There weren´t much dances and such at all. I hope they´d do better next year!


Coming to an end for the first week... We have finally managed to visit 7 different spots on 7 different nights.... With tonight, will be the 8th night. Am still wondering... will there be enough 25 spots for us to venture? Best.... if there is even 31 spots for us to encounter for the whole of December!


Who knows......

My ex husband never believed in such things. Nor did he believe that I was facing it the moment I gave birth. Thankfully, I had friends that helped me out when I was facing this.

When baby blues turn into psychosis

9 August 2010

Watch out for symptoms of post-partum depression. - Photo ©iStockphoto.com/ michellegibson

By BRIGITTE ROZARIO

The worst case that has been publicised of post-partum depression leading into psychosis is Andrea Yates in the United States. She was 37 when she killed all of her five children one morning. She filled the bathtub and drowned all of them.

It could happen to anyone, says Dr Adnan Omar, Head of the Counselling and Psychological Services Centre, Taylor's University College.

Pre and post-natal emotions are not to be taken lightly and pregnant couples should watch out for anxiety during pregnancy and depression after delivery.

According to Dr Adnan, it could happen to not just new mothers but also women who already have a few children. In the case of Andrea Yates, she had five children and she did not want the last child.

“ Firstly, she had her children one after another, their ages were not widely spaced out. Secondly, the problem became accumulated. Thirdly, she had a very cold husband. Fourthly, she did not want to have her last child. The last pregnancy was forced upon her by her husband because he was 'religious' and of the opinion that the pregnancy was a gift from God that should not be refused.

“ There was a combination of all these factors that exploded in a very bad way,” explains Dr Adnan.

Post-partum depression is certainly more serious than pre-natal anxiety and/or depression, he informs. Dr Adnan believes that it all depends on the pregnant lady's coping mechanism, how supportive her husband is and her support network.

Spotting symptoms

Because families are not trained to spot depression, Dr Adnan says the gynaecologist is the one who should spot potential problems when he or she engages the pregnant woman during checkups.

Basically, baby blues last no more than two weeks. About 80% of all women who have given birth will have some extent of the baby blues.

The baby blues' symptoms include a disturbed sleep pattern, loss of weight and fatigue. The woman, her hormones and body should adjust by two weeks and these blues would go away.

“ If these symptoms persist then we know that it has developed to become post-partum depression. Usually, the fourth day after giving birth is the peak of all the hormones going up and down and it should settle down as you get more sleep and begin to bond with the baby. Any of these symptoms that persist beyond two weeks, needs to be looked into and dealt with because, if not dealt with, it can develop into post-partum psychosis,” warns Dr Adnan.

Post-partum depression checklist (if you have five out of the nine symptoms below you are medically depressed):

- Depressed – tearfulness, hopefulness, anxiety, feeling of emptiness

- Loss of pleasure in all or almost all of your daily activities

- Appetite and weight change

- Sleeping difficulty (even when your baby is sleeping)

- Restlessness, sluggishness

- Extreme fatigue or loss of energy

- Feelings of worthlessness, guilt with no reasonable cause

- Difficulty in concentrating and making decisions

- Thoughts of death and suicide, or even of harming your child/children

Post-partum psychosis checklist:

- Feeling removed from your baby, family and surroundings

- Disturbed sleep, even when your baby is sleeping

- Confused, disorganised thinking, risk of harming yourself, your baby or anyone else

- Drastic changes in mood and bizarre behaviour

- Extreme agitation and restlessness

- Unusual hallucinations (involving sight, smell or touch)

- Delusional thinking not based on reality

It is important that the spouse, partner and extended family is also familiar with these symptoms so that they can look out for them.

Family history

When women go for their pre-natal checkup the gynaecologist would find out the family history to check if there is any history of depression. One of the predictors of having depression is if there is a family history of it.

Family history is one of the red flags that would pop up indicating there could potentially be a problem.

Among the red flags that signal potential problems are:

- Family history – If there is a family history of depression; if this is an unplanned pregnancy; if the lady herself was an unplanned child.
- Fertility treatment – If you have had to go through fertility treatment to get pregnant, you will have a lot of “what if” scenarios going through your head.
- If the partner/husband is absent through divorce or separation or if you choose to be a single mother.
- If the partner/husband is there physically but is emotionally absent. Sometimes that is worse because you expect your partner to help out but he is not supportive. Either he's not interested or he just doesn't know how to help.
- Your personal strength – In your life how have you dealt with difficulties. Part of being human is that we learn certain ways of doing things. In our family, when things get rough how do we deal with it.

These are the kinds of things that the gynaecologist should be looking at during the pre-natal checkups.

Besides looking out for potential problems, the couple should also watch out for panic attacks which stem from anxiety. Anxiety has four components – feeling overwhelmed (physically and emotionally); breathlessness, chest pains and sweaty palms; recurrent thoughts of your health or your baby's health; and a feeling that something horrible is going to happen.

If there is anxiety during the pregnancy or any potential depression after the delivery, the woman should get help from her support network and even find ways to relieve and handle stress, and even talk about her anxieties.

“ If you have five out of the nine symptoms in the post-partum depression checklist you are medically depressed and medical professional intervention is needed.

“ I think, in Malaysia, we are too quick to prescribe anti-depressant pills. These pills are safe in terms of breastfeeding but in terms of emotional healing you need psychotherapy which means you need to provide support and do talk therapy. And you need to teach the woman coping skills and how to handle stress.

“ Ideally she should go for talk therapy where she discusses what is worrying her and why she has these fears. Is she worried about the finances; that she won't be a good mother? Medication will not help settle these matters. It's better to talk about it.

“ Of course that will take time but it will teach her life skills and help her deal better with problems and stress in the future,” says Dr Adnan.

He emphasises that nothing gets better if you don't do anything about it. So, if you are showing symptoms of anxiety and depression, speak to a professional about it.

If a lady has post-partum depression and it is not dealt with, it might become severe after the next child. These fears, thoughts and emotions must be dealt with and she needs to learn how to better manage the stress in her life.

“ If you are constantly asking yourself 'What if', 'What if', 'What if', the depression level gets higher and higher as the months progress. If the depression is dealt with, then the woman will be better equipped to handle the next pregnancy. That's the point of going for counselling – you learn life skills and you won't have to go again for counselling in future because you have already learnt the coping skills and you can apply them to the next pregnancy.

“ But, if it is not taken care of, then the depression could become worse for the second pregnancy,” says Dr Adnan.

In order to not become overwhelmed and get depressed, Dr Adnan suggests planning everything from the point you find out that you are pregnant.

“ If hiring a maid is needed, then hire now. If you need to get your mother-in-law involved, then bring her to a meeting and discuss what you need help with. The more you plan ahead, the better off you will be because you need to take some time off for yourself.

“ Some ladies say they're going to devote every minute of their life to this new baby and soon they find they are neglecting themselves. You need to bathe or shower and get back to the point where you like how you look. You need to take care of yourself. While you are taking care of yourself, somebody else needs to help take care of the baby, so you need to get some help and support,” he says.

He advises husbands to prioritise so that they can be there to support their wife during and after the pregnancy.

What can the husband/partner do?

- Know the symptoms of depression.
- Talk to the spouse/partner – Ask them what's worrying them and try to comfort and reassure them. The husband or partner would be in the best position to do this.
- Get help as soon as possible because the longer you wait, the worse it gets.

During pregnancy, ladies need to work on expectations:

- You're not an angel and you will make mistakes as you try to be a good mother.
- There is no one definition for what is a good mother.
- What are your expectations of yourself, your husband/partner, your work, your child – you have to be very realistic.
- Managing expectations especially if you have to juggle family issues or you have work issues or even a bossy mother-in-law.

The support network (maid, nanny, babysitter, extended family, friends) must be formed in advance and you need to start planning so that you don't feel overwhelmed.

Dr Adnan's final advice for pregnant women:

- Get as much knowledge as you can about pregnancy, emotions and post-partum depression and anxiety.
- Learn the symptoms.
- Plan before and after – the more planning you do, the better off you will be.
- Do not be afraid to ask for help – the more you ask, the more help you will find. If people judge you, it's not your problem; it's their problem.

What Does the Next General Election Hold?

Never was I ever involved in any politics nor do I take not about the outcome of those political fights in my country. Don´t get me wrong.... you can say I´m being ignorant... but I am just not the kind that enjoy seeing people fight from left and right demanding this and demanding that and saying the other is more superior than the other.  But I do know... somehow... with all these tremendous fights amongst each other going on for sometime, I feel that somehow...... the next general election in Malaysia won´t be all that fun to play with......

Looking at the Star Online today, I saw this very interesting article from the Prime Minister himself about the political affairs here..... 

My opinion? Treat all of us down here equally, irregardless of skin color and race. That´s what a successful nation is.... but then again, its my own opinion...

Enjoy the article! Tschüß

Friday December 3, 2010

PM: Next general election will be D-Day for Barisan

By SIRA HABIBU
From Phnom Penh

THE next general election, scheduled to be held by mid-2013, will be “Judgment Day” for Barisan Nasional, Datuk Seri Najib Tun Razak said.

Held later or earlier, the Prime Minister said the result of the election would indicate the future survival of the long-serving coalition.

However, he added, the indications now were that the people were responding positively and restoring their faith in Barisan.

“But we cannot take it easy,” he told the Malaysian media here covering the Sixth General Assembly of the International Conference of Asian Political Parties (ICAPP).

“We must work even harder. Barisan has changed. We dare to change and make changes to convince the rakyat that our party is dynamic and sensitive to public needs and wants,” he said.

Earlier, in his keynote address at the assembly, Najib said it was important for long-serving political parties to be attuned to the current needs of the public.

“History has shown that even legendary ruling parties were ousted in elections as they were not attuned to the changing needs with the changing times,” he said, describing the 2008 general election in Malaysia as “a sobering albeit painful wake-up call” for Barisan.

“For the first time in history we (the Barisan) lost five states to the Opposition as well as our two-third majority in Parliament.

“But in the last 18 months, the ruling coalition had undergone significant transformation and the 13 political parties that make up the coalition have made great strides in changing and winning back the hearts of the people,” said Najib, who is also the Barisan chairman.

He reminded the gathering that it was critical for any political party to understand the need to change.

“Do not change for the sake of changing but change to better serve the needs of the stakeholders,” he said, adding that transformation and re-invention were essential in keeping with changing times.

Warning that in-fighting, internal power struggle and complacency could break even formidable parties, Najib said this could lead to the electorate shifting their support to alternative political forces that can serve their needs better.

“The current trend shows there is an overwhelming demand from the masses for inclusion and participation in the political process and in nation-building.

“A political party that understands these new rules of political engagement is the party of the future,” he said.